


Zero Fucks to Give

by Neviah



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Asexual Character, Asexual Raphael, Fluff, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-30
Updated: 2018-04-30
Packaged: 2019-04-30 07:23:11
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,336
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14491788
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Neviah/pseuds/Neviah
Summary: Simon like Raphael. He wants to hug him and hold his hand and do all those cutesy relationship type things. He just doesn't want to have sex with him.





	Zero Fucks to Give

**Author's Note:**

> Edit: The ending has been altered slightly.

Raphael was going to murder his fledgling. That was if the rising sun didn't kill him first. It was an hour before sunrise and everyone had returned to the hotel DuMort, except one Simon Lewis. Raphael had taken to pacing angrily in the lobby, scowling at the doors which remained stubbornly closed. Ten minutes of angry pacing later and the doors finally opened. Simon snuck in, head bowed ashamedly to avoid Raphael's gaze.  
"You should have been home an hour ago," Raphael scolded, causing Simon to duck his head further.  
"I know, but I was helping Clary with a thing..." Simon trailed off, knowing his excuses wouldn't swing Raphael.  
"Spending more time with your precious Shadowhunters," Raphael sneered, letting his anger overtake him for a moment before regaining control. "If she cared about you as much as you think she does, she'd let you leave her presence before you risked turning to ash."  
"It's not like that," Simon protested. "She's my best friend." Raphael sighed. They'd had this conversation several times already. No matter how many times they went over it, Simon could never see the many failings of Clary Fairchild.  
"Baby." Simon's cheeks coloured slightly at the pet name the clan (but mostly Raphael) had taken to calling him. The small amount of blood he had left rising to the surface. "She may be your best friend, but we're your family." Simon finally looked up and met Raphael's gaze. "We are here to look after you. You're still learning, you can't take those sort of risks." Simon went back to staring miserably at the floor. "Come on, let's get you fed." Raphael reached out for his fledgling's hand. Raphael could remind his fledgling of why Clary Fairchild wasn't worth his time after they ate. 

Simon was understandably flighty later when they were drinking. He refused to meet Raphael's gaze as the clan leader stared at him from the opposite sofa. Simon drank as quickly as possible and then rushed to stand.  
"Well this was fun-" he started, angling himself towards the door. Raphael remained silent but fixed him with his most unimpressed gaze, a look he had honed over the years of dealing with fledglings and whiny racist Shadowhunters and occasionally, Magnus. Simon took a step towards the door. Raphael raised an eyebrow. Simon stepped back and then sullenly retook his seat.  
"I know what you're gonna say," he complained.  
"Enlighten me."  
"You're gonna say that Clary is not worth my time and that I shouldn't be spending as much time with her because she's a Shadowhunter and I'm a downworlder and they'll never see us as anything more than that. But Clarys not like that. I'm still Simon to her, not just some Downworlder." His eyes widened suddenly. "Not that anyone is just a downworlder, we're not worse than the shadowhunters it's just that that's how they think but Clary is different. Thats why she asks me to help her with stuff, because maybe then the others will see that we can help and then they'll accept us more. And I know that's asking a lot but if we do nothing then it's not gonna change anyway so we might as well try." Raphael placed his glass down on the table.  
"What was it that Clary had you helping her with?"  
"There was a demon attacking people and she wanted me to track it."  
"And did you?" Simon turned his gaze to stare at his hands where they were clenched on his lap.  
"No."  
"You're still learning."  
"I know!"  
"That wasn't a criticism baby. You'll get better at tracking with time and training. If you couldn't track him why were you out so late?"  
"They managed to find him and wanted me to come with them to take him down."  
"They?"  
"Clary, Jace, Izzy and Alec."  
"The four of them weren't enough support?"  
"Maybe. I just," Simon sniffed and then swiped angrily at his cheek.  
"Baby." Raphael stood and moved towards Simon but he stood as well and took a step backwards.  
"For so long it's been just me and Clary, we've been friends for years. And it's not that I don't want her to have new friends because I do, and they're all really nice." Raphael made an unconvinced noise at that but remained otherwise silent. "And I know she's trying to help me, we just didn't notice the time and." Simon was really crying now, crystaline tears flowing down his cheeks. Raphael took a cautious step forward, hands stretched towards his fledgling. His heart broke for his baby, and while he desperately wanted to hunt down the shadowhunters who had done this to him and find out exactly what had occurred to cause this, Simon needed him right now. That and the cursed sun which by now had risen and trapped them inside. Simon lurched forward suddenly, arms wrapping tightly around Raphael's chest. He pressed his face into Raphael's neck, breath now coming in shaky gasps. Raphael wasted no time in gathering up his hurting fledgling, humming softly and running his fingers through his hair. After a while he moved them back to the sofa, arranging Simon so his head rested in Raphael's lap, who continued to stroke his hair and hum soft lullabies he half remembered from his childhood until the fledgling fell asleep. Raphael followed shortly after. 

Waking to a crick in his neck was something Raphael hadn't experienced for several decades, having gotten used to a certain degree of luxury. Looking down to a still sleeping Simon however was something he could get used to. The tears had long since dried, leaving faint marks across his pale skin. Raphael rubbed his thumb across one of the marks, vowing to get the story of what caused the sudden breakdown later when his fledgling was well rested and feeling better. Speaking of which, Raphael could only sleep for so long on a sofa before needing to move somewhere he could lie horizontally until the sun dipped back below the horizon. Standing as carefully as he could, he easily lifted the still sleeping Simon and started towards his bedroom. For a moment he hesitated outside Simon's door, reasoning that he should leave Simon in his own bed before retiring alone. However the thought of Simon waking up alone made him reconsider. The idea of being apart from Simon for longer than necessary also seemed less than appealing. Walking further down the corridor Raphael entered his room and easily manouvered Simon under the covers. He quickly changed into more comfortable clothes before joining him, leaving a suitable gap between them. Sleep pulled at him and he quickly found himself giving in to it. 

Raphael woke to someone poking him in the shoulder. He lifted his head to glare accusingly at whoever had the nerve to wake him. Simon blinked back at him, looking brighter but understandably nervous.  
"What do you want?" Raphael demanded. Raphael was a man who enjoyed his sleep, and being woken premuturely was not something he appreciated.  
"Why am I in your bed?"  
"You fell asleep on me last night. I thought it best to not leave you in the sofa."  
"Right. But why am I in your bed?" Raphael flopped his face back into his pillow, his words muffled but Simon was sure he heard the word idiota amongst some other probably insults. Deciding it was best to let Raphael sleep he started sliding backwards out of the bed. A hand on his wrist stopped him before he could make it very far.  
"Stay. We need to talk," Raphael said having reemerged from his pillow.  
"Talk? About what?" Simon's voice had taken on that high pitched quality it had when he knew he was in trouble.  
"About certain shadowhunters taking advantage of my baby-"  
"They weren't taking advantage. I offered."  
"And about certain idiota fledglings not know when to say no to said shadowhunters."  
"I can say no."  
"And said shadowhunters upsetting my fledglings."  
"That wasn't their fault," Simon protested, sitting up and scooting as far away from Raphael as he could. Raphael sat up and stretched before crossing his arms over his chest and pinning Simon with The Look.  
"I just. I guess it just really hit me last night. We were hunting that demons and they were all talking and Jace made a joke about my ongoing love of 'mundane movies" and Clary said that if I could I'd marry pop culture and we'd grow old together. Jace was quick to remind everyone that that wasn't gonna happen." Simon gave a soft self depricating smile. "And I just realised that this is my life now. I am a forever 19 year old vampire who is gonna have to sit and watch everyone I have ever cared about age and die while I stay exactly the same. I know the kindest thing to do for my family would be tell them I'd died in some accident and let them start grieving but," his vice hitched, "I just can't. I can't leave them. And Clary has her shadowhunters friends now and I."  
"You have the clan," Raphael reminded him. "And Magnus." Simon's lips twitched at the mention of the warlock who had already adopted the fledgling. "And me." Simon made a face. A "you're saying stupid stuff I don't understand again Raphael" face. Raphael tried to remember when he started being able to differentiate the different expressions that graced the fledglings face. "We've all been where you are. Realising we have to watch our mortal loved ones age and die. We can help you through it. If you want to cut ties with your family then we will tell you how to do that and be there for you afterwards. If you think you can continue seeing Clary and the shadowhunters we will support you." Raphael reached over and took Simon's hand. "Family sticks together, and like it or not we're family now."  
"Yeah right. Ohana and all that." Raphael sighed and gave Simon a look. An "I don't understand your strange mundane references" look. Simon grinned in reply. When the fledgling was ready to take the next step, Raphael would be there. 

Simon had fled Raphaels room shortly after their little heart to heart, but had chosen to spend his time inside the walls of the Hotel DuMort. He hoped that might placate Raphael enough to leave him alone to his freak out. Vampirism was not something that Simon had penciled into his 5 year plan, and said plan had promptly been derailed as a result. Though his plan was less plan, more vague idea of goals to reach. Namely, meet someone, get married, have kids. That was as much of his life as Simon had figured out, and even then those milestones were far enough off that he had time to fully figure out whether he even wanted any of that. He certainly thought he had before, when they were vague ideas of things. But now he'd been told he could never have them. Never fall in love and grow old with someone. Never spend his life with someone. He wouldn't be totally alone. He would still have Raphael and the clan, and Magnus had seemed to have taken a liking to him. But there was a difference between being with someone, and being with someone. Simon wondered how Magnus dealt with it, but asking a man how he coped with the constant knowledge that his boyfriend would grow old and die seemed unnecessarily cruel. 

Simon caved two days later and went to see Magnus. He reasoned that the warlock had always been immortal and might have a different perspective on things. There's a voice that whispered that really he's just avoiding Raphael but Simon had learnt to ignore that voice. Magnus welcomed him in, smiling like they're old friends and offering him a drink of something fruity spiked with blood so he could stomach it.  
"What's up?" Magnus asked when they took a seat.  
"Who said something was up?" Simon evaded.  
"Besides the look on your face?"  
"It's nothing really I just." Magnus waited patiently while Simon stumbled through his words. "I'm still adjusting to the whole immortality thing."  
"Ah."  
"Ah?"  
"I went through something similar with Raphael."  
"Really?"  
"Mmhmm. And while I think he found my advice helpful, my experience of immortality and his experience were very different. I am happy to talk to you about it, but speaking to him might be more helpful." Simon tried to hide his wince but the look Magnus gave him told him he hadn't been successful. "Unless there's a reason you came to me first and not Raphael?"  
"No. It's just Raph has better things to worry about than me whining about how I'm never gonna get a boyfriend."  
"Boyfriend?" Magnus asked.  
"What?"  
"You said how you're never gonna get a boyfriend."  
"No I said girlfriend," Simon denied. Magnus shook his head slightly. "Well that's only because I was thinking about Raphael. Not that I was thinking about Raphael being my boyfriend. Just that's hes a boy. Not a boy. A man. A man I don't want to date. Because I like women." Simon downed the rest of his drink and stood to leave. "I should go."  
"You should stay," Magnus countered. Taking the now empty glass from Simon and moving to refill it. "Raphael can handle the immortality stuff. Bisexual freakouts is much more my domain." Magnus handed Simon a new drink and then ushered him back into his seat.  
"I am straight," Simon insisted, have voice having taken on a high pitched almost squeky quality.  
"So you've never thought about being with another man?"  
"Well yeah, who hasn't?"  
"Straight men."  
"But that's just thinking about it. It's not like I've ever dated a man."  
"Neither had Alexander before we started dating."  
"But." Simon seemed to have run out of excuses and explanations for why he was clearly straight and instead sat back, drink apparently forgotten, and processed this new knowledge. Magnus let him have his time, content that he was there when his new bi baby was ready to talk. 

"So I'm bi," Simon finally admitted, looking up to meet Magnus' gaze.  
"If that's what you'd like to call yourself. You needn't label if it you don't wish to."  
"No I think." Simon swallowed heavily. "It actually makes a lot of sense I should've realise sooner, it's just I've been into Clary for so long that anything else paled in comparison. Finding passing men or women attractive was just how things were. I'd never met anyone I liked more than that until..."  
"Until?" Magnus prompted.  
"Raphael." The name was barely spoken above a whisper. As if Simon thought that saying his name too loudly might summon the man himself.  
"Sounds like you have a few things to discuss with him." If it were possible, Simon would've paled even further.  
"No I can't tell him. And you can't either." He pointed accusingly at Magnus with the hand he was still holding his drink with, the liquid sloshed dangerously close to the rim but thankfully didn't spill over.  
"My lips are sealed," Magnus assured him. "But you really should tell him."  
"No." Simon insisted. Magnus knew when to let things go so he conceeded. These things always had a way of working themselves out in the end. Magnus just hoped they didn't wait too long. 

Simon made it his mission from that day on to avoid Raphael as if his life depended on it. He went to Lily when he needed blood and to Clary when he needed a place to lay low that wasn't the hotel. Or rather he went to the institute and hoped Clary was there, which often times she wasn't so he mostly spent his evenings wandering around aimlessly trying to avoid thinking about a certain attractive clan leader. His problem with being attracted to Raphael was just that, he was attracted to Raphael. Or rather he thought he was. Raphael was attractive, vampirism suited him well and he had had a few centuries to perfect his holier than thou demeaner. Raphael could turn a simple look into a weapon, gather up his rage and scorn and direct it at whoever displeased him. They were the peasants beneath the wheels of his carriage who had dirtied it with their blood and then had the nerve to complain that he'd run them over. If a woman looked at Simon like that, or looked at someone like that in his presence, all blood would be heading swiflty south. When Raphael did it, it was powerful and impressive and showed Simon a glimpse of the type of vampire he could become if he committed himself to his training. But there was no activity below the waist. When Raphael smiled, Simon's mind raced with ways to make him smile again. When Clary smiled, Simon thought about kissing her. He'd never thought about kissing Raphael. He wasn't adverse to the thought, but when he played through various scenarios of him and Raphael, they'd talk or Simon would rope Raphael into watching some classic film he'd missed and they'd cuddle or hold hands. It never went beyond that. No kissing or touching or sex. He wasn't attracted to Raphael. Only he was. 

Raphael's fledgling was avoiding him. Ever since their talk he had seen neither hide nor hair of the young vampire. At first it had been understandable, then it became slightly worrying. Now it had crossed into annoying and Raphael planned to put an end to it. As soon as he could pin down his flighty fledging and get an explanation out of him. He knew that Simon had been returning to the Hotel for blood and sleep, but catching him had proven difficult. Raphael suspected someone was helping Simon avoid him, but narrowing down the list of clan members who would risk his wrath to help their new baby was a lost cause. The clan had adopted Simon as one of their own and no amount of Raphael glaring at them would make them betray him. It was equal parts endearing and annoying. At any other time that fierce loyalty to their baby would be welcome, but right down Raphael had a fledgling to find and they were not helping.  
"Lily," Raphael greeted as his second in command entered the room and headed towards their blood supply.  
"Raph, why are you lurking?" Lily replied, crossing her arms and stating suspiciously at her clan leader.  
"Where's Simon?" Lily rolled her eyes.  
"He doesn't want to see you."  
"Why?" Lily shrugged.  
"I didn't ask."  
"I can't fix it if he won't speak to me."  
"He needs time."  
"Will you at least tell him I want to talk to him."  
"No. But I will tell him you want to fix whatever you broke."  
"I didn't break anything."  
"Then it'll be a short conversation." Lily walked forward and snagged two bags of blood. She gave Raphael a quick kiss on the cheek before she left. Raphael tried to summon the energy to be mad at her, but the loyalty to Simon and keeping him safe and fed drowned out any anger he felt. 

Lily knocked twice before strolling into Simon's room. Simon was sat cross legged on his bed. He smiled at Lily and then scooted back to make room for her.  
"Raphael was lurking around when I went in to get this," Lily said, handing over one of the bags. Simon froze in the motion of reaching out to grab it.  
"What did he want?"  
"To see you, dumdum." Simon scowled and then grabbed the bag, turning to grab a glass off his table.  
"I don't wanna see him."  
"What did he do?"  
"Nothing! It's my thing." Lily knew better than to pry, even if she did hate seeing her baby hurting.  
"You know I'm here if you wanna talk about anything."  
"I know. Thanks."

It was half an hour before sunrise when Simon finally skidded through the doors of the Hotel DuMort, soaked to the bone and smelling vaguely of shadowhunter blood. Raphael almost recoiled as the scent hit him. Nephlimin blood was intoxicating, if Simon had been around it enough to carry the scent then they had a problem.  
"What happened?" Raphael demanded, eating up the distance between then in a few quick strides.  
"Valentine's men got the drop on us, we managed to fight them off but Jace got cut. It wasn't bad, but there was blood everywhere." Raphael noticed then that Simon was shaking, though whether from the cold or something else it was hard to tell. "It was like when I first turned, that unending hunger. It was like a physical need. I wanted to just rip into his throat and drink until there was nothing left." There was a haunted look in Simon's eye and though he was looking forward he didn't seem to be seeing Raphael, more like looking through him and instead seeing his own haunted past. "I grabbed for him. I missed but I still went for him. You should've seen the way Clary looked at me. Like I was a monster." For the hundreth time, Raphael wished he'd ripped her throat out when he was given the chance. "Maybe I am." Raphael's restraint snapped and he closed the final few inches between them, hugging Simon close to his chest.  
"You are not a monster. You displayed extraordinary restraint today. Restraint most vampires don't have, let alone fledglings. I am so proud of you." Simon made a high keening noise and his arms came up, fingers digging into Raphael's shoulders as if he'd disappeared if Simon let go. "Dios mio baby. You amaze me." Now he'd started talking, Raphael couldn't seem to stop. "You are so kind and generous to those estúpido no merece shadowhunters. You constantly risk your own life for theirs. They do not deserve you." Raphael forced down the 'I don't deserve you' that he actually meant. "I'm proud of you." Raphael repeated that over and over until Simon finally stopped shaking and started to relax his grip. They stayed locked in their embrace, but it wasn't as desperate as before. They were simply enjoying being each other's arms and company. When they finally parted they stayed near each other, trapped in each other's orbit. Raphael led Simon to his room and helped the younger vampire out of his sodden clothes before pushing him towards the shower. Rapheal found some clothes he thought would fit and left them outside the door. Simon emerged with a towel wrapped around his waist, exhaustion tugging at him. Raphael helped him into the clothes and then into bed, tugging him into his chest and listening to his breathing slow and even out, letting the sounds lull him into sleep. 

Simon could get used to waking up with a warm body pressed up against his spine. Strong arms were wrapped around his chest, holding him tight to the sleeping person behind him. Simon glanced backwards. Correction, sleeping Raphael behind him. His face had lost all the the tightness it seemed to carry when he was awake. He was no longer the overworked New York clan leader. He was a young twenty something. Or he was when he turned. Simon knew very little about Raphaels life before he became an unfairly attractive vampire. He wasn't sure it was something Raphael would want to discuss, and certainly not with him. Simon had done nothing but cause problems and be a liability since he showed up. Simon closed his eyes and tried to banish his intrusive thoughts, wanting to enjoy this moment for as long as he could before Raphael woke up and kicked him out, or worse, forced him to acknowledge his strange unformed attraction. Raphael mumbled something and snuggled closer, his grip tightening and then going loose again as Raphael slowly woke up. Simon stayed as still as he could and faked sleep.  
"Rise and shine baby," Raphael said, nuzzling into the back of Simon's neck. "You and me need to have another chat." Simon immediately tried to scramble away and escape out the door, but Raphael only tightened his grip again, keeping Simon pinned to his chest. "Stay." Simon stopped struggling. "You've been avoiding me."  
"Yes."  
"Why?" Simon turned his face into his pillow and mumbled out a response. "Try that again in English."  
"Because I don't want to have sex with you," Simon blurted out, immediately wishing he could take back the words. Raphael went very still behind him.  
"You, what?" Simon sat up suddenly and turned towards Raphael.  
"I don't want to have sex with you," he repeated. In for a penny and all that.  
"Okay. I don't want to have sex with you either," Raphael assured him, sitting up and frowning at his fledgling.  
"No not like that. I like you, I think you're pretty and I want to hug you and hold your hand and make you smile and I don't want to have sex with you or kiss you or do any relationships stuff except the shmoopy girly stuff."  
"Dios mios you're an idiot," Raphael accused before leaning forward and planting a kiss on Simon's forehead. "I don't want to have sex with you either." Raphael held up a hand when Simon opened his mouth to speak. "And that shmoopy girly stuff is everything I want out of a relationship. I have zero interest in sex, never have never will. Frankly I find the whole thing revolting. Holding hands and cuddling is as far as I want to go." Simon stared back at him, mouth agape blinking far more than he should. "Baby, is this what you've been worrying about?" Simon nodded mutely. "Idiota." Simon wondered when that had stopped sounding like an insult and started sounding like an endearment.  
"But I want to have sex with women." As always, Simon knew the perfect way to ruin what would otherwise be a romantic moment.  
"Okay."  
"But I don't want to have sex with men."  
"Where are you going with this?"  
"Isn't that weird?" That was the heart of the problem it seemed.  
"Says who?"  
"Everyone?" Simon replied.  
"Am I weird for not wanting sex?"  
"No!"  
"But you are for only wanting it with women?"  
"Yes."  
"Baby." Simon groaned and flopped back onto the bed. "Get your phone out," Raphael instructed. Simon looked unsure but did as he was told. "Now google asexual." The next few hours consisted mostly of Simon hunting through the depths of the internet for anything he could find on asexuality and then aromanticism and then the greater queer community in general. He'd occasionally come to Raphael with questions or for explanations or clarifications but mostly he seemed content to teach himself everything he seemed to have missed. 

Magnus threw them a far too extravagant party when they told him they'd started dating. The warlock was thrilled for them and wanted everyone to share in his joy. The whole clan came, as well as a selection of shadowhunters. Simon hadn't seen them since the incident so he was unsure where they stood, but having Raphael tell him that he'd ripped out the throat of anyone who hurt him actually helped settle his nerves.  
"Simon!" Said vampire turned to see Clary grinning at him, Jace not far behind. "I'm so happy for you." She pulled him into a hug that he somewhat reluctantly returned. "You could've told me you're gay you know, I wouldn't have judged." The phrasing rankled slightly but Simon tried to shrug it off.  
"I'm not gay Clary. I'm biromantic." Simon had finally settled on a label he felt suited. Biromantic heterosexual.  
"Bi-what?" Simon had prepared for this. Raphael had already warned him that some people might not accept or understand it. Simon just didn't think Clary would be one of those people.  
"Biromantic. Actually I'm Biromantic heterosexual. It means I can be romantically attracted to men or women but only sexually attracted to women." Simon could see Alec nodding just behind Clary. Simon sent him a grateful smile and the shadowhunter smiled back. The furrow in Clarys brow told Simon she didn't get it. "But that doesn't make sense," she objected. "Sex is sex. If you're attracted to men then surely that means you're attracted to men." Clary wrinkled her nose slightly in confusion. "Maybe you just need to give it time. It's a new relationship."  
"Nope," Simon contradicted. "Don't need to give it time. I know I like Raph and I also know I super don't want to have sex with him." He flashed Raph a look to gauge his reaction. The older vampire simply smiled and then nuzzled lightly at Simon's cheek.  
"But-" Clary started.  
"Clary stop. I can understand you not really getting it. Hell it took me long enough to get it. But openly contradicting me on my own sexuality, well it hurts." Clary sighed at that.  
"I'm just trying to look out for you."  
"By questioning my sexulaity and my relationship in front of the man who I'm in a relationship with? And who is perfectly happy with how our relationship works."  
"More than happy," Raphael added. Clary sighed again.  
"Come on Si, we’ve been friends for forever. I know you better than you know yourself,” Clary laughed. “It’s okay to be bi.”  
“I know,” Simon insisted. “But I’m not bi. And I’ve already told you that you questioning me hurts.”  
“I’m not questioning you, I’m just saying maybe you need time to fully think about this. I don’t want you to miss out on things because other people convince you you don’t want them.” At this she flashed a look at Raphael who displayed a remarkable amount of restraint in appearing unaffected by the implication.  
“I told Raph I didn’t want to have sex with him before I even told him I liked him,” Simon confessed. Alec gave a short laugh but when Simon looked the shadowhunter was grinning at him like they shared a joke. “He hasn’t convinced me of anything, this is just who I am. It just took me a while to realise.” Clary didn’t say anything for a while and Simon dared to hope that he’d finally got through to her. Then she smiled sadly at the younger vampire, something like pity in her gaze.  
“Clearly you need some more time to get your head sorted. Come see me when you're ready to talk," Clary replied. She grabbed Jace's hand and half dragged him away. The pair quickly disappeared into the crowd. Hurt lodged in Simon’s throat.  
"Give her time," Alec said softly. Simon never thought Alec would be the one on his side but it kind of made sense, they were queer peers. Simon made a mental note to never say that aloud.  
"It’s okay, I know it's... not the norm."  
"I don't think anything is these days." At that point Magnus appeared at Alec's side and they shared a quick kiss.  
“It’s like she thought she was doing me some favour.” Simon hated how much her words had affected him. This identity he had found was new and untested, and Clary’s words had effectively ruined his previous elation at the new found understanding and brought forth the doubts and questions he was hoping to stave off. “What if-“ he started but was cut off by Raphael flicking him in the ear. Simon flinched and then spun to frown at the other vampire.  
“Today is for celebrating our relationship, baby. Not giving in to the whims of Clary Fairchild and letting her question you.” Raph placed a quick firm kiss on Simon’s forehead and then placed his hands on the younger man’s shoulders to spin him back around. Simon wanted Clary to understand and accept him, but as Raphael came to stand beside him and easily took his hand, he realised that the people who really mattered already understood and accepted him.


End file.
